The Newbie Experience?

Last night I was bored, so I thought I'd go look for some new dances for my chimera. Sine Wave's sim gives me a headache in about 5 minutes, so I thought I'd head over to Henmations to see if they had anything new.

Could Henmations PLEASE make a separate dance store? Because it is horrible that people simply looking for dances have to go there and have this mess standing all around them.




He was 2 days old. She was 6 days old, and blinging for all she was worth, which I didn't capture. Before they had even rezzed in for me, the first thing I saw him say was "I'm not hiding it because I don't know if I'll be able to find it again."

Yep, he was talking about his Freenis.

Somehow he managed to talk this girl into sitting on one of the beds so they could chat. Me, being nosy and bored, which is never a good combination, I decided to follow just within their chat range [thank you, Mystitool] so I could see what kind of moves new residents are using these days.

The results were highly hilarious!

Unfortunately, Henmations is a magnet for newbies, since they are one of the top paid classifieds and since most of their items are sexual. They DO have some really awesome dances but it's hard to shop there at times because of the new people who assume SL is all about sex. I hadn't been there in a couple of months, at least, and I have never gone alone. If they'd open up a separate store for just the dances, I'd imagine they'd sell a lot more. Just a theory on my part.

Anyway, so Newbie Bob and Newbie Summer [not their real names] make their way over to a bed. I make my way over and stand on the other side of the wall so I can hear them. Now you'd think that with Bob's Freenis hanging out, sex would be immediately what he wanted. Oh no, not so. You see, Bob and Summer didn't know to sit on the poseballs. They just sat on the edge of the bed while he proceeded to grill her about her music tastes and why she felt the need to change what she was wearing. I'm assuming she was wearing something else when they met because the whole time I saw her, she was wearing a "Pirat" outfit with the belt embedded into her butt.

I was about to just go on and check out the dances when suddenly Newbie George entered on the scene. His approach to Summer was a little more direct.

"You want sex?"




Bob decided to stand up to protect Summer's honor.

Bob: "This guy wants sex and I want to talk, who do you want?"
Summer: "What?"
Bob: "He wants to have sex with you and I want to talk."
Summer: "Ew, get away!"
Bob: "Who?"
Summer: "George!"
George: "That's ok, I'll come back later. With a bigger penis."


At this point I'm practically snorting my drink out of my nose. And I should say that I'm cleaning up their sentences quite a bit, as it was mostly chatspeak and bad grammar.

So Bob begins questioning Summer's musical tastes again, briefly, and then suddenly launches into questions about her personal life. He wanted to know if she had a boyfriend in real life, or one in Second Life, and why she didn't have either. Then he tells her something that had my whole group laughing. [I share, what can I say?]

Bob: "You know why women can't find Prince Charming?"
Summer: "What?"
Bob: "I'll tell you why."
Summer: "Ok."
Bob: "I'll tell you why you can't find your Prince."
Summer: "I'm waiting."
Bob: "It's because you're looking for the Prince, not the frog."
Summer: "... what?"

Then some girl came up to look at the bed they were on, and Bob assumed that she wanted sex. The girl said "Pfft, yeah right" and wandered off. Bob said he knew that girl would have sex with him [I seriously doubt that she would have], but he wanted to stay with Summer. Summer said he should go and try out his new Freenis. I was starting to think Summer was done with Bob and his mess, because then she got up and started to walk over to the dances. I followed, of course, because I was there for dances anyway.

Summer: "Could you take that off?"
Bob: "Does it bother you?"
Summer: "Yes."
Bob: "Why? It's not real."

Now this is where it got interesting. Bob believed because Second Life wasn't "real," that he could do anything he wanted. He could ask for sex without being polite because it's not real. He could walk around with his Freenis hanging out because it's not real. And he honestly couldn't see why anyone would have a problem with what he was doing.

Of course, when it appeared that Summer did not share this mindset, he backtracked a bit and said that he didn't want to be rude to her because he knew there was a real person behind the avatar. What? And the rest of us are NPCs or something?

But it did get me thinking. How many other new residents are coming into Second Life thinking that they CAN do anything they want? Sure, you can do things like fly and become a neko or an elf and wear the most fashionable clothing. Sure, you can build and drop full grown trees and never drown. But this wasn't even what Bob was talking about. Bob didn't think he had to not show his Freenis! Bob thought he could tell anyone what to do and they'd do it! Bob thought sex was what Second Life was truly about!

Second Life isn't a place where you get points for being rude. You'll never be the #1 SL God because you think you're good looking. People don't do what you want in SL just because you tell them to because we are real people behind the avatars, and we don't owe you a thing. I know that Linden Lab is looking to fix that first hour new user experience or whatever they're calling it, but when?? And are the SL mentors really doing their jobs out at these orientation places? Is there a guide that they follow when explaining Second Life, or it is just up to each individual mentor?

All I know is, there needs to be a big sign at every welcome area.

"Put Your Free Penis Away."